Thursday, March 27, 2008

roxie roker would be proud

did you know that lenny kravitz is god an interior designer? i had no idea. i'm a bit late on the celeb news. last i heard he was divorcing denise huxtable and then one day i was pushing my mclaren stroller down haight street when i practically run into the man coming out of buffalo freaking exchange.
i'd love to say, that he stopped in his tracks, did a 3/4 pivot, all went dark save for the spotlight, and he broke into 'lady'. but, that song hadn't come out yet and what really happened, was i shuffled after him all desperado like, pushing my baby, recklessly, stalking him in my burberry barn jacket and prada slip-ons (middle aged at 30-i was dealing with a teensy identity issue), the wheels of the carriage getting stuck every few feet, causing me to jerk awkwardly forward. i did this for about 3 blocks. i never spoke to him. i just walked, block after block. following his big furry coat and leather billy jack hat. i'm guessing it probably ended with me wiping down a pay phone with hand sanitizer and calling anyone who might be equally as star struck.
non sequitor moment.
so yes, it seems that god lenny has a, nyc based, 9 person design team called 'kravitz design' (who also need to get their i.t. guy to add photos, SOMETHING, to the website) i couldn't find a lot of examples of the work of kravitz design, but here are a few that i did find: these, shot of his own condo in nyc show the million dollar redesign with the intention to sell at 19 mil and some change (if one of you buys this place, i get commission)
his 'theme' (he does theme rooms. oy.) 'african fantasy penthouse meets las vegas high roller suite with acres of shag carpeting, fur couches, zebra skin chairs and all sorts of phallic and faux elephant tusks' that's just brilliant lenny. all god's creatures being put to good use.
here's the thing. i don't really like lenny's music that much (and oh how i've tried). nor do i care if he has an interior design firm (actually i did care when i found out- but was a bit underwhelmed by the photos). truth be told, i just like to look at him. look at him and soak in all of his undefeatable coolness factor. and i love his lineage. (who didn't love helen willis on the jefferson? and i don't mean you al roker, you can sit down.)
here's lenny doing his best little edie impression. i don't know who looks cooler. but it takes a certain something to get away with towel-as-hair in your daily repertoire.
do you see what i mean? few 46 year old men (that i've seen here in manhattan beach) can pull this look off. tat yourself up men, pierce your every nether region. you will not get away with it like lenny does. here he is contemplating "the zebra fur or the gnu fur?" conundrum. "puddled or to the floor? morrocan poofs, suzanis? no, too last tuesday. maybe, just a nice elephant hoof refashioned into a foot stool, with a red velvet cushion on top to give it that highroller vegas 'pop!''
who cares if the guy has talent or not. i'm not even sure that i am 'feeling' his asthetic exactly. he's probably a very nice person with a lot of profound thoughts to share. but really, if i had an extra million, was single and hadn't found the love of my life, kravitz design would be starting the prelim. plans for making my beach bungalow into a hot steamy groto of crazy phallic, african, las vegas love, on monday.

12 comments:

Sparkie said...

There was a profile on LK and his design interest specifically on "CBS Sunday Morning" 3/23. Interesting as I half-watched it. He always has a picture of his momma prominantly displayed in all of his abodes (they listed all of them but I started daydreaming at Jamaica...). The one where the interview took place was a huge 60's-ish wall graphic. I don't know if this interview is something viewable somewhere; I'm just putting it out there. I think it said he also decorated a club or hotel lobby in NYC or LA....um, it was Sunday morning and I was nursing my Caffe Trieste latte and pencilling in my answers to the NYT crossword. Other fun fact: his like 19 year-old daughter by Lisa Huxtable Bonet lives with him and popped in during the interview. I think that officially makes me ninety-two. Doesn't seem to phase him though...

beachbungalow8 said...

that's exactly what prompted this posting. my friend becky mentioned it to me yesterday. i did some investigating (saw the wallpaper room of which you mention)
i saw photos of his beautiful daughter too. how is she 20 already? that makes ME 92.

which futher, prompted me to wonder what the hell happened in the roker gene pool when it came to al roker (cousin)

Alison said...

Had to wipe my chin....and swab my forehead while watching his video cover of "American Woman In Red White & Blue" for the first time.....
Don't get me started on his "Fly Away" video (check both out on YouTube)
He is hothothot...pssssst.....YOWWW!!

Agreed re: his music though, love those 2, but not into his other stuff.

The epitome of plain ol' garden variety coooooool.

katiedid said...

Hilarious. I can't think of anything else to say that tops your observations. He is just a bit too cool for this chick.

Sparkie said...

OMG. Another tidbit I just remembered from the CBS interview: he's been celebate for 2 years! He's over the whole Rock Star perk thing apparently. That and maybe the fact that his mother's staring down at you from the wall might be a little off-putting for the ladies....

Cote de Texas said...

You are too funny! that's some of the ugliest shit I've ever seen but hey - he is cute! Why are you so funny? So,,,,,how's married life? good b.s. huh?

simply seleta said...

Your description of running with your stroller had me cracking up. Thanks for the laughs. Great post. Although his interiors are about as attractive as Steve Martin's mansion in the movie "The Jerk". Ha ha ha..

CatHerder said...

Great pics..i LOVE Lenny....i may not need that second cup of coffee now!! **grin**

beachbungalow8 said...

no, really. he's a god. a god of 'coolness'. CELEBATE for 2 years? holy crap. this makes the whole engagment to nicole kidman thing understandable.brrr.

Sandy said...

That was so freaking funny!

Alison said...

PS: lest you thought I meant HIM, I mean most of his music is GV coooool.
(he, on the other hand is outta bounds coooool)
Now I feel better......(!)

anne said...

Oh, hell, I just saw this. I love me some Lenny. And what makes me love him more is that a few years ago Howard Stern interviewed him right after he broke up with Nicole Kidman. Stern kept trying to him to talk shit about Nicole, and he wouldn't. He was an absolute gentleman. And come on, you know there must be plenty to dish about Nicole.

P.S. It's very, very busy here in the library at Our Lady of Oppression. In case you're wondering. In case you wanted to know how I'm squeezing this in while I'm busy with very, very important library work.

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