waxing for martha

this picture bears no relevance to this post.
it's merely to grab your attention. as of today, moving forward, whenever i mention 'martha stewart's name, i here by commit to referring to her as 'our lord and saviour' . why you might ask? well, for one, i feel that i owe it to my many, many anonymous readers (who shall remain anonymous, it seems) those readers who really do feel that the words, lord and saviour, are synonymous with the grande dame of design herself.
also, i've noticed quite an up swing in traffic and controversy whenever i mention her name. which is good for this little blog. and so i will now treat her with some well deserved reverence. i also like it because this opens me up to a whole other group of people that will be offended and will, most likely leave some bb8 bashing comments (which also brings in the traffic)
now, the best will be the bible thumping, martha stewart zealots out there. who will be sitting at their computers, fingers hovering, making false starts to write, something, but then scratching their heads, getting so confused by what they're exactly offended or not offended by.
now let's see. how shall i pull in politics to this theater?


Anonymous said…
You really got me thinking with this one. Do you think Martha Stweart Our Lord and Savior waxes fleur de lys patterns into her hoo hoo? Perhaps the Stewart clan crest? Or maybe just the silhouette of one of her beloved pomeranians?
beachbungalow8 said…
i'm sort of scared to think of what martha stewart, our lord and savior has going on down south.

i suppose her carpet matches the drapes though. i can't imagine she would over look that.

i'm laughing at the fleur de lis reference though! big high five
Anonymous said…
I bet she has special scissors from France, for routine maintenance.
You know, I have to say I've always thought of her as a sorta 'dirty preppy' albeit faux (Polish bloodlines and all) so I'm guessing her hygiene north and south is only maintained if her staff of PA's have something scheduled for her. She's also looked to me like deoderant and otherwise does not come naturally...
Like the face and clothes look great but as she turns on her heel, the back of her head has one of those smattered down grease spots from bedhead.
Anonymous said…
I like the way you write, bonjourbruxelles!
Anonymous said…
To say that Martha is O.L.S. is a bit much in my book...but hey, everyone is entitled to look up to someone.

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